Braun Strikes Back at Critics; Denies Denial

Since news of his suspension broke on Monday, Ryan Braun has dominated the national sports discussion.

In short, the 2011 National League Most Valuable Player has been suspended the remainder of the 2013 season, a period of 65 games, for violating the league’s policies on the use of performance enhancing drugs.

This move appears to be a direct result of an ongoing investigation into the Biogenesis clinic and its proprietor, Tony Bosch, and could be the first in a long line of similar disciplinary decisions handed down by Major League Baseball.

The suspension has generated no shortage of opinions, with several high profile athletes weighing in on the issue.

“I can’t believe this is a guy I trusted,” said legendary cyclist Lance Armstrong. “We were so close we used to get our blood work done together. Dude has some balls to try to pull something like that on the American public.”

Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez echoed Armstrong’s sentiments, saying “he is an embarrassment to all of us who try to do things the right way,” before adding, “Wait, he only got 65 games? I need to make a phone call.”

Not all of the responses have been so derisive however.

The brothers Pouncey, NFL stars and noted advocates of social justice, were seen sporting “Free Braun” t-shirts at a gun expo in North Attleboro, Mass., while University of Miami Athletic Director Blake James was quoted as saying, “Ryan remains a shining example of the character we instill in our student-athletes here at the University of Miami. In the realm of a Jewish man having a detrimental impact on the image of our department, this one wasn’t so bad.”

 
It has been reported that 50 games of the suspension have been attributed to the use of PEDs, while the remaining 15 stem from Braun’s actions following his first positive test in October 2011. 

In the wake of the announcement, much of the criticism from journalists and the public alike has focused not on Braun’s alleged drug use, but his vehement denial of those allegations following the dismissal of his initial positive test.

Not one to let his name be dragged through the mud, Braun blasted back at those critics through a statement on Tuesday night:

I could have never, ever envisioned being in this position where I would have to face such malice and slander as I have endured over the last 24 hours from those claiming I would ever be so bold to deny my use of performance enhancing drugs. The last day or so has been difficult but I view this as an opportunity just as I have every other challenge in my life – an opportunity to continue my cycle. 
 

I have absolutely no respect for the game of baseball and have always, and will always put what is in my best interest ahead of what is best for the game. By no means am I perfect, but if I ever intentionally or unintentionally painted the use of PEDs in a negative light or tried to disassociate myself from the amazing benefits, I would be the first to admit it. I can't get into all the details, but I truly believe in my heart that this so called denial that has caused such an uproar never occurred. 
 

I also believe that everything in life happens for a reason and we’re able to handle everything that’s thrown at us; except a 95-MPH fastball which is why I started juicing in the first place. It’s just plushdamentals baby.

To the wildly ungrateful Brewers organization, you’re welcome for hitting so many home runs, that a race between men dressed as packaged meat products became the second most interesting reason to come to the ballpark. To the people of the black hole they call the city of Milwaukee, you really have only yourselves to blame. Let’s be serious, if you’re genuinely emotionally invested in Brewers baseball you need to reevaluate some shit. Am I sorry about the $29.99 you spent on that Ryan Braun t-shirt jersey? Nope. And I’m not sorry your girlfriend will probably still want to wear it to bed every night.  

The words class, dignity, honor, integrity and professionalism have been thrown around a lot in this process but I don’t speak Russian. Let me put this in plain American for you -  I love PEDs, I would never claim otherwise, and you can bet your life that this substance has not entered my body for the final time.  

When presented with the overwhelming evidence that he did in fact deny using performance enhancers after his original suspension was overturned on a technicality, Braun recanted his statement, an act which prompted commendation from the Major League Baseball brass.

He has since also been named a Nobel laureate, received the NAACP Image Award and is the early frontrunner for TIME’s Man of the Century.